Imagine How an All-Time Film Noir Classic ‘To Die For’ Cabinet Might Look Like

Just for fun while some of Trump’s picks stew in political broth, close your eyes

Imagine It Delivering Death-Defying Defense with Finesse,
Coupled With More Than a Smattering of Brute Force Intelligence
Gathering and Vaccine Vetting

 Consider what some will see as Preposterous, others as Perfect Picks!

Co-Directors of Department of Government Efficiency
Mike Tyson, Hulk Hogan

Secretaries of Homeland Security
Sylvester “Rocky” Stallone

Co-Secretaries of Defense
Alec Baldwin, Machine Gun Kelly

Secretary of the Treasury
Bernie Madoff

Secretary of Health and Human Services
“King of the High Wire” Nik Wallenda

Secretary of Text Trafficking
Matt Watergaetz

Attorney Generalissimo
Rudy Giuliani with an issimo

Director of the CIA
Ethel Rosenberg

Director of National Crypto Intel
  Sam Bankman-Fried

Chief of Staff
Arnold Schwarzenegger

Head of Environmental Protection Agency
John D. Rockefeller

White House Press Secretary
Kanye West

Border Czars
Generals Sherman and Patton

And finally,

Secretary of our lush, beautiful Interior
Johnny Weissmuller
(just Tarzan, no Cheetah)

That’s all folks, the movie’s over, now back to (ugh) reality!


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