Imagine It Delivering Death-Defying Defense with Finesse,
Coupled With More Than a Smattering of Brute Force Intelligence
Gathering and Vaccine Vetting
Consider what some will see as Preposterous, others as Perfect Picks!
Co-Directors of Department of Government Efficiency
Mike Tyson, Hulk Hogan
Secretaries of Homeland Security
Sylvester “Rocky” Stallone
Co-Secretaries of Defense
Alec Baldwin, Machine Gun Kelly
Secretary of the Treasury
Bernie Madoff
Secretary of Health and Human Services
“King of the High Wire” Nik Wallenda
Secretary of Text Trafficking
Matt Watergaetz
Attorney Generalissimo
Rudy Giuliani with an issimo
Director of the CIA
Ethel Rosenberg
Director of National Crypto Intel
Sam Bankman-Fried
Chief of Staff
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Head of Environmental Protection Agency
John D. Rockefeller
White House Press Secretary
Kanye West
Border Czars
Generals Sherman and Patton
And finally,
Secretary of our lush, beautiful Interior
Johnny Weissmuller
(just Tarzan, no Cheetah)
That’s all folks, the movie’s over, now back to (ugh) reality!
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