Madden Mischief

Fortune Telling Telepathy

Scientists show telepathy neural implants can keep mice in line.  No big deal!  Mr. Musk’s implants can keep all of mankind in one long humongous line awaiting that rare replenishment called chargers, that is if you can find one. (rimshot)

Robotaxis

As a people person, I tell robotaxis to go RoboF___ themselves!  I’ll take a crab any day of the week, I mean a cab, provided a fair tab and please, sparce blab.  (laugh)

Queer Across America

Here’s magnificent Trump’s masterful message he sends queer across America:  Make America Straight Again!  (a little louder please)

Here’s a classic

Want to attend a JD Vance Rally?  Only Married Couples with Children Welcome. Oh rats, no cats!   (laugh please, even Republicans, a little lauder)

Oh, and did you read what former U.S. Secretary of Labor Robert Reich posted? Reich said Musk disseminated a faked version of Kamala’s first campaign video with an altered voice track sounding like Harris saying she doesn’t “know the first thing about running the country” and is the “ultimate diversity hire.”  Knowing how liberally Left is Reich I doubt he’s much of a Muskcovite.  (haha)

Planet Politics

Back on planet politics, wouldn’t it be refreshing if instead of name calling, and flushing solid waste into smelly campaign ads, politicos focused on something called “issues.”  How novel would that be?   (yay!)

And now my pledge

I pledge allegiance to the mag, the mag-nificent seven.  They’ve put food in our tummy but it’s like playing gin rummy, yet I’m hardly Stu Unger, just a guy who melds hunger.  (louder please)

Let’s Awaken Motivation

In the morning nothing can motivate as much as that urge to urinate, then after we floss, brush and gargle, that other eruption, we expectorate!  Now don’t be an ingrate!  (laugh!)

And now the closer for you dozers

JOYfully, here comes Gov. Tim Walz a waltzing in with new campaign song, a contemporary version of Waltzing Matilda:

Once a jolly master sergeant camped by a billabong
Under the shade of a Coolibah tree
Now a gov oratin’ and awaitin’ fer my billy boiled
You dems come awaltzin’ with Kamala and me.

Oh, and a Footnote

To the words of wisdom from Anne Frank who once said “In the long run, the sharpest weapon of all is a kind and gentle spirit,” I would add from the POV of a stand-up pigeon, just a smidgeon of humor.

The End (ha ha)

Yes, Madden tries his best to be a comedian and entertain his readers with scenes like those he describes in his first book, SPIN MAN, when he was VP of NBC and before that dodging pallbearers at ABC.  His sixth book Planetary Lifeguard sets a more serious tone in blowing the whistle on climate change.  When he’s not writing books and Madden Mischief blogs, he’s running his PR firm TransMedia Group along with his resourceful daughter Adrienne Mazzone, who harbors an uproarious sense of humor, next to her father’s smidgeon as a stand-up pigeon.